Dennys: News Politics Comedy Science Arts & Food

30 June 2009

Ouch Category Cartoon: America Geography Lesson



From Denny: "Forgive me, Father," but I really love these guys in Denmark! These two cartoonists have great wit about current culture.

This cartoon strip comes to you from: Wulffmorgenthaler.com. If your monitor cannot make out the detail just click on the title link and it will take you directly to this particular cartoon, enjoy!



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28 June 2009

Outrageous Category: Top 10 Super Bowl Ads 2008

From Denny: This video had me laughing so hard yesterday I just had to put it on the blog for today's grinner!

Odd Category Video: Thrillicious Dancing Lizards Ad

From Denny: In honor of the great entertainer Michael Jackson!

27 June 2009

George Carlin: Outrageous comedian



George Carlin: Outrageous comedian: "'Life's journey is not to
arrive at the grave safely
in a well preserved body,
but rather to skid in sideways,
totally worn out, shouting
'...holy sh*t ....what a ride!'"

By alekhouse @ HubPages

From Denny: Here's an interesting article from a new writer over at HubPages you will enjoy!

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26 June 2009

New Software: Find Out Who Follows Your Tweets on Twitter

Image of Twitter from TwitterImage of Twitter



Photo by PinkMoose @ flickr

From Denny: If you are a blogger and are over at Twitter, try this new fun gadget to help you learn who is following your tweets. Connect with your Peeps! :)

Just plug in your user name @ Twitter:

Twitter Analyzer

Hello to my followers in the following countries and thank you for following, much appreciated!

Here are the countries in order of most followers first - what a surprise to find out Ecuador was right up there with the UK:

America
Ecuador
Great Britain
Germany
Iran
Australia

France
Switzerland
Netherlands
Belgium
India
China

New Zealand
Thailand
Turkey
Poland
Kenya
Bolivia

Japan
Indonesia
Pakistan
Canada
Mexico
Columbia
South Africa

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Weird News Video: Updates on Several Odd Stories

Called the "Un-News."



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25 June 2009

Weird News Video: Wonder Bra for Men!

From Denny: What will they, the fashionistas, think of next?

24 June 2009

Totally Ridiculous Comedy: Jacks Nightclub



Totally Ridiculous Comedy: Jacks Nightclub

By Denny Lyon @ HubPages

From Denny: "I like nonsense - it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope... and that enables you to laugh at all of life's realities." - Dr. Seuss

Wrote this yesterday as a raucous fast-paced ridiculous short story. It's really a bit long to post here and when that happens I park those writes over at HubPages. Take a look and you will be amused! Thanks for visiting!

Here's an excerpt from my world of the ridiculous:

"Jack jumped over the electric blue fox - who was hunting down the orange cat - who was preying upon the stupid cockroach that was having an identity crisis - and believed he was a popular dragonfly down at the local Irish pub - because he sang Irish songs everyone loved and wrote some damn good poetry.

The orange cat circled back to chase the identity crisis cockroach - who just knew he was really Irish in a former life - while the blue fox preened and bathed in the fast-paced lights of the nightclub – this fox enthusiastically embraced blue as the new fashion neutral - it was Jack who was looking for the weird alien orange cat that kept eluding him - who was stalking the brave Irish-singing cockroach determined to make it to Broadway.

The powerful-singing cockroach drowned out the elegant Irish pub-singing dragonfly - and soon the people customers complained about the strange odd noises blaring from the rising platform – it was two ants standing on a leaf singing opera - and more ants joined them from the audience singing 49 Bottles of Guinness Beer on the Wall and Get Down Tonight! – and soon the nightclub was jumping and bumping - and the people were dancing and squishing and splatting the friendly ants - who got the place hopping on a Saturday night in the first place."

For more of the story just click on the title link!



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23 June 2009

22 June 2009

Ouch Category: Dogbert and Monday Morning Conference Meeting

From Denny: Ah, the Monday morning "conference" meeting of suck-ups... Think of this cartoon during your next corporate meeting and try not to grin out loud so they can see you! :)

Dilbert.com

21 June 2009

Obnoxious Category: Dogbert the CEO and hiring employees

Dilbert.com

20 June 2009

Past 100th Post!



Photo by d u y q u @ flickr

From Denny: I'm well past the 100th post here at this blog. OK, so I'm not exactly the anniversary wonder girl. It's actually 114 posts now - close enough! :)

Just wanted to take the time to thank everyone for subscribing to the feed and following on Blogger and other sites. You are much appreciated! Blogging is so much more fun when you have company and such good company you all are, thanks! Thank you for your support and hope you are enjoying your time here chuckling right along with me.

Are these not the sexiest shoes in this photo or what! Gives a girl confidence!

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Ouch Category: Dogbert the CEO says...

Dilbert.com

19 June 2009

Outrageous Category: Toilet Humor


Toilet Humor, originally uploaded by geeknerd99.

The flickr photographer found this outragoues sign in a bathroom in China - talk about strange do's and don'ts! Do people really need to be told these things???

Odd Category: Toilet Humor Sign

Yet another real sign, talk about weird... Just how much do you have to educate people about using a toilet properly? This isn't rocket science!

Odd Category: Toilet Humour


Toilet Humour, originally uploaded by aneye4apicture.

Real signs with perplexing meanings... hmmm...

Toilet Humour


Toilet Humour, originally uploaded by pocketcanoe.

This gives new - and silly - meaning to toilet humor.

"Always lower the seat before sitting down."

Added Twitter Counter to ALL Blogs



From Denny: Just added the Twitter Counter to all the blogs! Come by and drop off a link to YOUR NAME on Twitter! Great way for you to boost your followers and just plain fun. Get a little link love! :)

Have also started a reciprocal Link Love on The Social Poets and will be extending it to the other blogs too. Just email me, Denny Lyon, warriorspearl@gmail.com so I know which blog is the best fit for your site's link - unless you have a preference. Keep a link on your site or blog with a link to one of my blogs and I'll keep a link for you too.

If we don't promote each other in cyberspace, who will? :)

Here's the link to the Twitter Counter page to make your own:
http://twittercounter.com/pages/buttons/skydiver

Here are quick links to the various blogs:

The Social Poets

The Social Poets Fav Bloggers

The Social Poets Fav Links

The Healing Waters

The Soul Calendar

The Soul Calendar Fav Links

Romancing The Chocolate

Comfort Food From Louisiana

Dennys Blog Feeds

Visual Insights

Beautiful Illustrated Quotations

Ouch Outrageous Obnoxious And Odd

Thanks for visiting!







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18 June 2009

New Additions to Photo Blog Roll!



From Denny: "Can I tell ya?" Spent hours and hours this past weekend pouring over some awesome photo blogs, amateur and professional alike, sifting through them to place the BEST on my blog roll for you! There are about 70 choices now - around there, I lost count... :)

If you enjoy looking at photos and want to see what is going on in the photo blogosphere then this is a good place to start. My blog roll list is located at my photo blog, Visual Insights.

Talk about a wonderful way to while away a few hours with beautiful and thought-provoking photos! Take a look and enjoy! Go here.

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Obnoxious Category: Two Bulls Talking About Women



Photo by Darren Copley @ flickr

From Denny: Here's a cute joke...

The young bull leans over to the older more experienced bull and says,"Hey! Check out all the women over there! Let's run down the hill, grab one and have our way with her!"

The older more experienced bull looks over at the younger bull with great disdain and offers his sage advice, winking, "Let's walk down the hill and have our way with all of them!"

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17 June 2009

Ouch Category: 5 Funny Unfortunate Website Names



Photo by kmevans @ flickr

From Denny: Where does Christoph find this stuff??? :) There is nothing funnier than the truth!

Here's an excerpt from his wild article:

"Here in the inquisitive offices of the Curmudgeon, we trudge through the sewage of the Internet so you, lucky readers, do not have to. We pull out just the interesting stuff, was it off, spray it with some sanitizer and bring it to you. That is how we found ourselves wearing our virtual hip waders and sloshing through AOL where we came upon the following item: these 5 unfortunately named websites, whose names say more than was intended.

It makes you wonder who made up these names in the first place and ponder how much they got paid to do it, for you or I could surely do it better. Without further jabbering from me, lets get started.



Gotahoenorth.com

Do they want us to go to Tahoe or hire a prostitute? They both can relieve tension I’m told. I’ve been to Tahoe and it is, without a doubt very nice, but this time I think I’ll go ta hoe."

For the other outrageous 5 sites he mentions, just click on the title link to take you to the article! Tell me what you think!



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16 June 2009

New Blog Look!



From Denny: Have spent the day fine-tuning the new blog template. It's just so much fun (not!) when you have to go back to the original sites and generate and install a new code for one thing: the original no longer fits in the new column, too large or too small, the Amazon store and the visitor counter and more. Simple to do but time-consuming. Hopefully, I've gotten all the details. My eyeballs look like a Halloween scary mask, all blood shot! :) (Hmmm... is this where I'm supposed to whine and whine some more...?)

Why did I decide to change the look? She must be crazy, you tell yourself silently in your own head. (You are right, BTW.) Actually, Himalman of Himalman's Weblog suggested I change my template. He even provided the link to a great template site.

After a couple of hours (remember there are 12 blogs now) of pouring over pages of great interesting templates for the Blogger platform, I downloaded a bunch of them, all excited to get started. One by one, none of them were accepted to upload to Blogger, even though all were compatible with my browser. Great... now what? Well, after studying the best for so long by then I realized I could do something close to the preferred templates - and set about redesigning the blogs by using Blogger's established templates.

Hope you enjoy the new look and find the navigation much easier! Thanks for visiting! And me? I'll be the guy at the drug store buying eye drops so I won't scare the neighborhood children...

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Outrageous Category: Calvin Klein Billboard Depicts Threesome Orgy!



*** Have been working on changing the blog templates on all the 12 blogs and am just now getting caught up on the daily posts. Apologies to everyone looking for a new post this weekend. Check back a few days to make sure you didn't miss anything funny!

From Denny: Here's the latest wild and crazy from my sarcastic funny friend, Christoph, over at his blog The Crusty Curmudgeon!

Here's an excerpt from his article:

"Here in the orgiastic but not depraved offices of The Curmudgeon, we often engage in orgies, but I speak not of the sexcapades of a group of people as we know the term today, but in it’s ancient sense of secret, late-night meetings. Since I am the boss here, I suppose that makes me the orgiophant (a teacher or revealer of secret rites.) We had such a meeting just late last night, where we discussed….orgies. Specifically, orgies – in this case a threesome – depicted in advertising.

Here’s the beef (cake): Calvin Klien has unveiled a new, giant billboard in N.Y.C. depicting 3 persons in various stages of undress – except for their Calvin’s, of course – who appear as if they are about to engage in behavior which some might find objectionable. In other words, they’re about to get it on."

For the rest of this funny criticique just click on the title link!

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15 June 2009

Odd Category: Hilton’s Brawl With Love Rival: Snack Attack!



Photo of Paris Hilton

From Denny: OK, I never keep up with this silly stuff. But I can rely on my friend, Christoph, over at his blog, The Crusty Curmudgeon, to make a snarky comment or two about the wealthy doing stupid things while the rest of us are trying to find a new job. The press is just plain stupid for even following this idiot stuff. What is funny is what Christoph has to say about the insanity. :)

Here's an excerpt from his comment on pop culture:
"Here in the titillated but not aroused offices of The Curmudgeon, we enjoy seeing two women together in “that” way but not in a cat fight. I don’t know why this appeals to so many men. The cat fights, I mean, but I don’t know why the other thing turns men on either. I read once that men’s desire to see to attractive females in “compromising positions” together is so universal, that it exists even in the primitive tribes of faraway lands. So prevalent in fact, that it could be considered a harbinger of whether or not a man is straight or gay. In other words, if you don’t like seeing two sexy gals get it on, you ain’t straight. I’m just sayin’.

So it is with some amusement that I report the following “cat fight” story involving Paris Hilton, who wouldn’t turn me on under any circumstances, even if I was from a primitive tribe in a faraway land. I read the story first at contactmusic.com, but it may have been initially reported by the AP, or Pop Eater, or Time, or the New England Journal of Medicine as far as I know, since the story is everywhere, because let’s face it, this is news. Never mind that Iran just announced they are weaponizing their plutonium – this is news, damn it! Hold the press-on nails!"

For the rest of his funny article just click on the title link and it will take you there! Thanks for visiting!

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13 June 2009

Funny: My Cats, Their Names, and What They Made Me Call Them Instead



My Cats, Their Names, and What They Made Me Call Them Instead

"In this hub:

Ah, cats (sigh)
On naming your cats
Excuse me?
His Royal Highness wants to go by something else
Our favorite cat mysteries
Kao K'o Kung
Mistaken Gender and embarassed cat
Thomasito Vincenzo

Cats are finicky creatures. We've all heard that. We've all experienced that. Cats also feel and know more than many give them credit for. Any cat lover will tell you they are as bright as they are ornery.

It's the little things in life that they choose to notice. They are opinionated, so you can be sure that you will in one way or another find out what they think about the things that matter most to them.

One thing I've learned over the years, sometimes the hard way, is that one of the keys to getting a cat to respond to you properly is giving it the right name. That comes through trial and error."

By Frieda Babbley @ HubPages, humor writer

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12 June 2009

Obnoxious Category: Political Observation from Dilbert Cartoons

From Denny: Don't you just love Dilbert cartoons? They are politically savvy to say the least...

Dilbert.com

11 June 2009

Ouch Category: How to Tell if Your Child is Socially Awkward

From Denny: As I have been updating new comic links and this cartoonist was so much fun I had to blog one of his videos over here for you to enjoy! A person does wonder if he is labeling "insane" kids as the children of conservative Republicans... what do you think?

10 June 2009

Ouch Category: Retired Fighter Pilot Joke

Air National Guard F-16 Fighting Falcon fighte...Image via Wikipedia

From Denny: This is from a friend and fellow blogger over at MyBlogLog who is hilarious. Jay's site is named Daily Hogwash and is sometimes a bit edgy. You can click on the title link to take you to his blog. This is one of his latest story jokes:

"Retired Fighter Pilot

A ragged, old, derelict shuffled into a down and dirty bar. Stinking of whisky and cigarettes, his hands shook as he took the "Piano Player Wanted" sign from the window and handed it to the bartender.

I'd like to apply for the job," he said. "I was an F-4 Phantom pilot and a Colonel in the Arizona Air National Guard, but when they retired the Phantom program they bagged me as well. So, I learned to play the piano the GI Bill.

The barkeep wasn't too sure about this rather doubtful looking old guy, but it had been quite a while since he had a piano player and business was falling off. So, the barkeep decided to give him a try and said, "OK Give me a sample of your playing."

The Colonel staggered his way over to the piano while several patrons snickered. By the time he was into his third bar of music, every voice was silenced. What followed was a rhapsody of sound and music, unlike anyone had heard in the bar before. When he finished there wasn't a dry eye in the place.

The bartender took the old fighter pilot a beer and asked him the name of the song he had just played. It's called "Drop your Skivvies, Baby, I'm Going Balls To The Wall For You!" said the Colonel, after he took a long pull from the beer.

"And I wrote it myself," he said.

The bartender and the crowd winced at the title, but the piano player then went on with a knee-slapping, hand-clapping bit of ragtime that had the place jumping.

After he finished, the fighter pilot acknowledged the applause and told the crowd the song was called, "Big Knockers Make My Afterburner Light." He then excused himself as he stumbled and lurched to the john.

When he came out the bartender went over to him and said, "Look Colonel, the job is yours, but do you know your fly is open and your Unit is hanging out?"

"Know it?" the old fighter pilot replied, "Heck, I wrote it!""

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09 June 2009

Funny Story: The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Beers

Can of Guinness Original, plus the beer in a glassGuinness is good for you! Image via Wikipedia

From Denny: Just received this fun email from a cousin in Kentucky. Feel free to send it along to all your friends.

Remember: Ireland's Guinness Stout and Boston's Samuel Adams Stout have CHOCOLATE in it! Drink up! :)

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Beers


"When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.'

Please share this with someone you care about.. I JUST DID!"

Keep smiling as you share that beer with friends!

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08 June 2009

Odd Category Photo: Funny "Porno" Veggie - a Carrot!



From Denny: From the snappingpanda blog comes this little photo funny. Check out her site for more!

"Out of all the many dozens of carrots in the market, my mom innocently picked this funny but equally innocent carrot."

07 June 2009

Ouch Category: Darth Vadar Not So Intimidating Now!



From Denny: This little curiosity popped up over at geeksugar.com. Bet you don't think the super villain Darth Vadar is so intimidating now! After all, how scary is Darth Vadar while on the pot? Ian Pool's photography likes to portray iconic superheroes and other geek characters in their "real," regular lives. Amusing! The title link will take you to geeksugar.com. Check out their site too!

Photo by Ian Pool @ IanPool.com

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06 June 2009

Odd Category: Goofy Kitty


Funny Kitten, originally uploaded by Tela Chhe.

There's always just one guy who isn't photogenic... I wonder why... :)





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05 June 2009

Obnoxious Category: Please Be Safe Sign


Funny Sign, originally uploaded by tenioman.

What will they think of next to deter stupid humans??? Here's a better upload of the photo as part of it was clipped off by the Blog This function over at flickr:







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Fav Outrageous Cartoon of the Month

Signe Wilkinson