A Christmas Post: Funny Christmas Poem: Santas Curmudgeon Version of The Christmas Story

A Christmas Post: Funny Christmas Poem: Santas Curmudgeon Version of The Christmas Story: From Denny:  OK, for the naughty folks out there who enjoy some holiday sarcasm comes this silly poem sure to make you grin - or wince.

Just when everyone is tired of making nice to the relatives just read this one aloud to the gathering to cut the grumbling.  Sure to make some folks howl with delight or indignation!  Oh, look, yet another family fight during the holiday season. :)

Santa Jingle Dog Tags

Make some merry this holiday season! Jingle Jingle!

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Ouch Outrageous: How the Christmas Tree Angel Really Got to the Top

From Denny: Tiger Woods cartoons just keep churning out this holiday season. This guy really has "stupid for brains" and the mostly male cartoonists are certainly not going to let him live it down either.

Found a few funny Christmas stories to amuse you too. Don't you just love your friends who send you these emails from anonymous funny authors? :)

Tiger Woods just keeps on giving to the cartoonists:

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Randy Bish - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Terry Mosher - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

How the Christmas Tree Angel Really Got to the Top

Santa was very upset. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right!

Mrs. Claus had burned all the cookies. The elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had while making the toys. The reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk. To make matters worse, they had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and had crashed it into a tree.

Santa was furious. "I can't believe it! I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours and all of my reindeer are drunk, the elves are on strike and I don't even have a Christmas tree!"

He continued, "And I sent that stupid Little Angel out hours ago to find a tree and he isn't even back yet! What am I going to do?"

Just then, the Little Angel opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, dragging a Christmas tree behind him. He said, "Yo, fat man! Where do you want me to stick the tree this year?"

And thus the tradition of angels atop the Christmas tree got its start...



*** THANKS for visiting and for more fun:

The Funny Side of Christmas - Cheeky Quote Day! 16 Dec 2009

Obnoxious: Santas Curmudgeon Version of The Christmas Story

Funny Essay on Why Santa Must Really Be A Woman

Obnoxious: Santas Curmudgeon Version of The Christmas Story

Christmas Story

'Twas the night before Christmas - Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!

I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks, Santa" - what do I hear?
The old lady bitches ‘cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money - The reindeer all fight.

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those a$$holes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?

And the kids these days - they all are the pits
They want the impossible - Those mean little sh*ts
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's - No request for them,
They want computers and robots...they think - I'm IBM!

Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
I'll sit on my fat a$$ and draw unemployment.

There's no Christmas this year - now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season!

Author Unknown - but Submitted by Bubba

See Cartoons by Cartoon by Brian Fairrington - Courtesy of Politicalcartoons.com - Email this Cartoon

*** THANKS for visiting and for more fun:

The Funny Side of Christmas - Cheeky Quote Day! 16 Dec 2009

Funny Story: Lovable Inflatable Christmas Louise

Funny Essay on Why Santa Must Really Be A Woman

Funny Story: Lovable Inflatable Christmas Louise